Ever put your wang in a toaster?

Remember when Marty McFly walked down that dark alley into… the future?

It’s here now. Sort of. Blade runner is not that far off.

Realdoll has new “robots”. These things have eyes that blink, and heads that move. They moan. They talk. They have robot voices and a monthly payment plan that goes with it.

Do you really want to be Loudermilk Will Sasso storing a life size $7500 Barbie, chain locked in your closet, only to defile her under the covers with your big butt cheeks popping out, like you’ve never been kissed.

Reminds me of the mid life crisis, middle aged Youtube Chinese Man from New Jersey, stumbling on an incoming taste of fame, while becoming the connoisseur of houses of ill-repute. We’ll leave him unnamed, due to his recent fame struggles.

Dildos. Telephone Dildos.

Years ago, “they” wrote about tele-dildonics and the possibilities of consexual connections through the internets.

Once told my thoughts about thrusting into a Fleshlight, mounted in a foam Liberator triangle, that was connected to a metal sex machine through Netscape Navigator. Hearing this, my camgirl friend lovingly told me I needed a girlfriend.

All these technologies and no one has made an explicit love you long time video demonstrating a basic sexytime act. The internet BJ is still taboo?

Maybe the west really is still terrified of statues needing John Ashcrotch to cover dem titties. Never been to France to see titties on street billboard advertisements. Merica.

Everyone is an up-tight, conservative, repressed, and degenerate pilgrim.